Pastor Leke Babayomi

Through several media (both conventional and social media), the society has indoctrinated us with the idea that being single is a “curse.”  They make us feel that only people who are in a romantic relationship are emotionally healthy. They also make us feel that if you’re not in a relationship, something is likely to be wrong with you. That explains the reason why some people feel inferior when they are not in a relationship. Most young men and ladies are in a hurry to leave the single stage of life. And so they jump into a romantic affair once any nice, good-looking person shows an interest in them. They think that all that matters in life is having a “boy or girlfriend”, that special person who gives them butterfly feelings, cloud nine happiness, when they are together. They never cease to fantasize about taking walks in the park, holding hands, kissing and so forth. But they are heading towards destruction!

There is nothing wrong with a desire to enter a relationship that will to lead to marriage. But when you get into it just for the sake of “being in a relationship”, then that is a red alert. Is the pre-marriage stage of life all about hooking up and breaking up with several lovers until you find someone with whom the hook clicks permanently? Nah! I believe that God has better plans for us than that. Singleness is a beautiful gift from heaven with innumerable benefits. In this pre-marital phase of life we are supposed to focus on and sort out a couple of matters.

Some of these are:

• Self-discovery of your Skills, Talents, Passion and Purpose (STPP);
• Investing long hours in personal development of your STPP;
• Developing an ability to live and make good decisions independently of your parents;
• Building healthy relationships with friends and associates;
• Developing a solid sense of reasoning and judgment;
• Grounding in our walk with God by developing the fruit and gifts of the Spirit.
• Having a robust foundation in the knowledge of God that you can apply effectively to every area of your life. This implies an ability to live by faith, discern the mind of God concerning simple decisions that you make from time to time. You need to get used to hearing from God, praying and receiving answers to prayers as well as developing confidence in having God as your Father with whom you can relate.

Singleness becomes a curse only when you put yourself under unnecessary pressure. Singleness is a curse for people who are following the popular trend of sexual pollution and immorality. So, when people put you under pressure to hook up, tell them that you’re taking your time. Even when it seems your singleness appears to be prolonged, remember that God will make all things beautiful for you in His time. And when His time clicks, your marriage will be an inspiring story to others. Relax and be at rest. God will sort you out in this area. Fretting will lead you into mistakes but being at rest will attract God’s best for you.

Psalm 27:14: “Wait on the Lord: be of good courage, and he shall strengthen your heart: wait, I say on the LORD.”